Cyril Gordon

Cyril Gordon   Why didn’t anyone ever tell me this before?

   That’s the question I asked myself the moment my life turned from hopeless to hopeful, from joyless to joyful. Here’s how it happen:

   I grew up in a secular Karaite Jewish family I San Francisco. I believed in God, but he seemed distant. As a young boy, I would leave synagogue services spiritually unsatisfied. After I was bar mitzvah, I dove headfirst into a life of drugs, sex and partying.

   But while I was in college, majoring in art at U.C. Santa Barbara, I began wondering if there was more to life than partying. I started searching for meaning in various philosophies and religions. I explored Existentialism, Zen Buddhism, Taoism, Confucianism, and Shamanism, but nothing satisfied the craving bin my soul.

   In 1989, I went to Israel to learn more about my Jewish roots. While there, I discovered that the Hebrew Scriptures was the word of God. This realization launched me into religious Judaism, which meant not working on the Sabbath day, eating only kosher foods, growing my beard, and wearing Tzit tzit (tassels).

The Vision

   When I learned from Israel, I had an amazing spiritual experience that stuck with me through my years of soul searching. While all alone in a Southern California desert, I cried out to the God of my ancestors. Then I looked up into the clouds and saw what looked like a roadway to heaven guarded on either side by two large angels. I stared at this vision for hours, filled with a wonderful sense of hope.

   Suddenly, in another cloud I saw what looked like a man lying down. He had a beard and a crown of thorns, and I could tell he was Jewish. I was confused by what I saw. I understood why God showed me the road. He was showing me the way to him. But why would he show me this dead Jewish man with a crown of thorns? I knew in my heart that one day God would show me who this man was.

   For the next four years, I sincerely tried to follow God’s law under the tutelage of a local rabbi. But God still felt far away, and the more I learned about his holy law, the more I realized that I was constantly breaking it. I became impatient with God and tried to help him give me more revelations by searching for the truth is astrology, numerology, tarot cards, psychics, new age books, and drugs. I knew I shouldn’t, but I did it anyway. Soon I became addicted to pornography and psychics, and my lifestyle landed me in jail for four days, accused of three felonies. I was confronted by my ungodliness. I realized then that I needed help. Little did I know that the solution was etched in big bold letters on the jail wall next to my bed: JESUS.

Time to come home

   Shortly thereafter, I met a Gentile girl who believed in Jesus. I remember seeing the close relationship she had with “my” God (the God of Israel), and I remember reading the Hebrew Scriptures as well as the New Testament. I was as jealous as I was intrigued; I had always thought that the New Testament was for Gentiles and that the Hebrew Scriptures were for Jews. Here I was, a self-professed religious Jewish Levite, and I didn’t know the God of Israel as well as the Gentile girl! It didn’t make any sense. We talked all afternoon, and the peace that emanated from her amazed me. I said to myself, “Now here is a true Israelite.”

   A month later, she sent me a box full of books about Jesus a five-page letter. I figured that she had a crush on me, but her letter said she was sincerely interested in my spiritual well-being. I spent the next couple of weeks flipping through some of the books. Then one night I had a powerful dream. An awesome, glorious man appeared. His head and his hair were white like wool, as white as snow, and his eyes like a flame of fire. His feet were like fine brass. He had an ancient looking parchment in his extended hand that said in big bold letters, “IT’S TIME TO COME HOME.” I woke up immediately knowing in my heart that something special was going to happen to me soon. Sure enough, two days later, I picked up one of the books my friend had sent. It outlined how Jesus fulfilled all of the prophecies about the Messiah in the Hebrew Scriptures.

   I was shocked, angry, and excited all at the same time. It became so clear that Jesus was my people’s long lost Messiah. Why didn’t we already know this after 2,000 years, I wondered? I pored through the book as though it were a treasure chest, comparing it to my Jewish Bible to make sure that the prophecies were the same in both. When it all checked out, I thought, “What now?” The end of the book described God’s plan for reconciliation with us.

   “Behold, the days are coming, says the LORD, when I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel and the house of Judah … I will put My law in their minds, and write it on their hearts … and their sin I will remember no more.” (Jeremiah 31: 31, 33, 34)

   That afternoon in 1993, I called out to Jesus for forgiveness, accepted his death as a sacrifice for my sins, and acknowledged that he rose from the dead. Immediately, I felt the love of God surround me, and the heavy, sticky darkness of sin lifted from my shoulders. I finally found what I had been looking for, a personal relationship with God. Since then, I have stopped looking at porn, using drugs and seeing psychics.

   The vision I had now made sense; God was trying to tell me that Jesus was the way to God. Maybe he’s trying to tell you the same thing.

   Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.” (John 14:6)

Cyril Gordon 2

Cyril Gordon and family

Cyril's Hearing His Voice Testimony

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