Proverbs 11:12
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He that is void of wisdom despiseth his neighbour: but a man of understanding holdeth his peace.
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It is easy to sin with your mouth. And there are many ways to do it. Solomon warns here against saying negative things about your neighbor. Wise men do not despise others with their words. They will hold back the negative things that wicked fools are quick to say.
The very limited context is the following proverb, which condemns talebearing. "A talebearer revealeth secrets: but he that is of a faithful spirit concealeth the matter" (11:13). Talebearing is telling anything about another, whether true or false, that is neither necessary, nor helpful to their reputation. See the comments on 11:13.
Speech is one of the most certain indicators of wisdom, or the lack thereof. For the words of a man's mouth reveal the heart inside (Luke 6:45). Mere quantity can prove either wisdom or folly. "A fool's voice is known by multitude of words" (Eccl 5:3). One of the simplest rules for wisdom is to cut your words in half. See the comments on 17:28.
The LORD, Creator of heaven and earth, hates evil speech about others, so He condemned backbiting, despite, gainsaying, hatred, malice, malignity, railing, reviling, slandering, swelling, talebearing, and whispering, among other related sins. Of course, you will rarely hear these sins mentioned in public, let alone defined and condemned.
The LORD considers unkind speech about another to be a violation of the sixth commandment. Jesus said, "Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not kill; and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment: But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire" (Matt 5:21-22).
Loving your neighbor is the second greatest commandment (Matt 22:39), with your neighbor being much more than the people next door, as the Good Samaritan proved (Luke 10:29-37). Your neighbor extends even to servants of another man (30:10). And loving your enemies is another commandment (Matt 5:43-48). So you have no room to hate or speak evil of others. We were all born hateful and hating each other in malice and envy (Tit 3:3), but now we are to be changed by Christ's grace (Tit 3:2; Eph 4:31-32).
It has been said, "If you can't say anything nice about them, then don't say anything at all." Perfect! That is exactly what the proverb teaches! And parents should enforce this with children toward siblings, classmates, and any others that come up in conversation.
A cure for this wicked habit is to avoid despising others in your heart, "Curse not the king, no not in thy thought; and curse not the rich in thy bedchamber: for a bird of the air shall carry the voice, and that which hath wings shall tell the matter" (Eccl 10:20). Even if correcting another overtaken in a fault, we are to do it meekly and fearfully (Gal 6:1).
When someone curses you, remember Solomon's advice, "Take no heed unto all words that are spoken; lest thou hear thy servant curse thee: For oftentimes also thine own heart knoweth that thou thyself likewise hast cursed others" (Eccl 7:20-21). Return a blessing for their curse, not railing for railing (I Pet 3:8-9). Show yourself a child of the King!
Jesus attacked those who thought they were righteous and despised others, by giving the parable of the Pharisee and the publican (Luke 18:9-14). It is wicked pride and haughty conceit that cause a person to despise others (Rom 12:16). And those who love to despise others for their motes are never wise enough to see their own beams (Matt 7:1-5).
When Jesus was reviled and threatened, He neither reviled nor threatened back, when He could have justifiably foretold their earthly and eternal damnation (I Pet 2:21-24). We are to follow the very steps of His example to be Christians ruling our tongues!
How kind is the word of God, when it names failures! Gideon is a man of faith! Samson is a hero in the cloud of witnesses! And Lot is a just and righteous man, whose righteous soul was vexed every day by the wicked men of Sodom (Heb 11:32; II Pet 2:7-9). Here is kindness and mercy, even to those with major blots in their personal histories.
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