Laughter Is an Instant Vacation 1

Laughter Is an Instant Vacation 1

"Laughter is an instant vacation." Overwhelmed by stress? Need an attitude boost? Feel like you need a vacation?

We have the relief you need and you don't even need to pack a suitcase! Laughter Is an Instant Vacation. Laughter can change your mood in seconds.  Laughter is key to your mental wellness. It can pick you up, keep you positive and bust stress, all within minutes. Here are some church bulletin bloopers. It is time to start laughing:

·         Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

·         The outreach committee has enlisted 25 visitors to make calls on people who are not afflicted with any church.

·         Evening massage - 6 p.m.

·         The Pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday    morning.

·         The audience is asked to remain seated until the end of the recession.

·         Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 to 8:30 p.m. Please use the back door.

·         Ushers will eat latecomers.

·         The third verse of Blessed Assurance will be sung without musical accomplishment.

·         For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

·         The Rev. Merriwether spoke briefly, much to the delight of the audience.

·         The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth Into Joy."

·         During the absence of our pastor, we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when J.F. Stubbs supplied our pulpit.

·         Next Sunday Mrs. Vinson will be soloist for the morning service. The pastor will then speak on "It's a Terrible Experience."

·         Due to the Rector's illness, Wednesday's healing services will be discontinued until further notice.

·         Stewardship Offertory: "Jesus Paid It All"

·         The music for today's service was all composed by George Friedrich Handel in celebration of the 300th anniversary of his birth.

·         Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

·         The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement on Friday at 7 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

·         The concert held in Fellowship Hall was a great success. Special thanks are due to the minister's daughter, who labored the whole evening at the piano, which as usual fell upon her.

·         22 members were present at the church meeting held at the home of Mrs. Marsha Crutchfield last evening. Mrs. Crutchfield and Mrs. Rankin sang a duet, The Lord Knows Why.

·         A song fest was hell at the Methodist church Wednesday.

·         Today's Sermon: HOW MUCH CAN A MAN DRINK? with hymns from a full choir.

·         Hymn 43: "Great God, what do I see here?"

·         Preacher: The Rev. Horace Blodgett

 

·         Hymn 47: "Hark! an awful voice is sounding"

·         On a church bulletin during the minister's illness: GOD IS GOOD Dr. Hargreaves is better.

·         Potluck supper: prayer and medication to follow.

·         Don't let worry kill you off - let the church help.

·         The 1997 Spring Council Retreat will be hell May 10 and 11.

·         Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to church secretary.

·         At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.

·         The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth Into Joy."

·         Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

·         Announcement in the church bulletin for a National Prayer and Fasting Conference: "The cost for attending the Fasting and Prayer Conference includes meals."

·         Charlene Mason sang "I Will Not Pass This Way Again," giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.

·         Next Sunday is the family hayride and bonfire at the Fowlers. Bring your own hot dogs and guns.

·         The church will host an evening of fine dining, superb entertainment, and gracious hostility.

·         For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

·         Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget your

         husbands.

 

Live Inspired, Douglas Raine – FGBMFA National Director for Outreach and Training